Thursday, September 27, 2007

Chapter 11

Jaime looked back as he near the poker room, half expecting to see Tricia following along. He wasn’t sure if he was relieved or disappointed that she didn’t seem to be going to follow and watch him play. He knew that she would know how boring it could be. It wasn’t like watching it on television where you got to see the players cards and had announcers filling in the dead time with amusing chatter.

Before heading for his table he went into the restroom. The coffee with breakfast might not have been a good idea he thought, since it always made him need to pee. After taking care of that he looked at his hands while standing in front of the sink. They were shaking a bit and he realized he felt very on edge. In part it was because this was the first tournament that he was under sponsorship for. In part it was seeing Tricia again.

He washed his hands and splashed water on his face. After drying them he looked into the mirror, thinking hard. He wondered if when he’d sent that card if he’d been trying to warn her he would be there or if he’d subconsciously hoped she would come because she knew he’d be there. After a long time of telling himself hehad to do it so that they would not run into each other with no warning, especially if Matt had come with her, he realized that deep down he had hoped to see her.

The problem was that he was seeing somebody else now. It was, by the very nature, an infrequent thing. She never came to spend time with him while he played poker. He knew too many people in the poker world and sometimes his wife did go with him as a sort of vacation. His rendezvous with her were always separate, special times for just them. He admitted to himself that it wasn’t as good as his memories of his time with Tricia. As always he wondered if that was memory playing a trick on him.

Still thinking more about Tricia then poker he made his way to his table and sat in his assigned seat. He made small talk for a couple of minutes with the dealer, whom he knew in passing. He knew none of the other players who had thus far wandered in and taken their seats.

Nobody seemed to want to talk and his mind wandered back to Tricia. Feeling her in his arms when she had hugged him had been like an electric shock. The night before he had some so close to asking her if she wanted to go up to her room that it scared him. He had actually contemplated leaving the tournament and going home but in the end he decided that he had to follow through in his obligations.

Not only did he now have an obligation to represent his sponsor but he also had an obligation, he thought, to Tricia to maintain the promise he’d made years ago. In part that had been broken now that they had made contact but he was determined that was as far as it would go. Her seeming willingness to resume their relationship in some degree unsettled him. He’d dreamed of it but in his dreams he’d been the one who wanted it and she had been adamant that she had to be true to her husband. Now with a child too he would have thought that she’d be even more adamant. Was he misreading her? Maybe it was just wishful thinking on his part that she seemed to want to resume things. He sure thought the night before that she was flirting with him and would have been glad to have him ask to go to her room.

A hand slapping his shoulder startled him out of those deep thoughts. He looked around and saw Kevin James standing behind him.

“Hey Jaime,” Kevin said jovially. “Don’t tell me you’re nervous. You looked like you were totally lost in thought and then you jumped like hell when I finally got your attention.’

Jaime stood, shaking Kevin’s hand. He was a well known tournament player, by far the best of the very good lot playing for Jaime’s sponsor. He had gotten friendly with Kevin over a year ago and Kevin had become somewhat of a mentor and had been the one to get him his sponsorship deal.

“I know I shouldn’t have been but I was thinking of something else,” Jaime admitted sheepishly.

“Well there’s still fifteen minutes until it starts and I know you know how to shift gears and focus. You did look like you were pretty deep in thought though. Anything wrong?”

“Good question,” Jaime said with a sigh. “I can’t begin to go into it now.”

“Well if you want to talk we can find time,” Kevin said. “I just wanted to wish you good luck. I have to go see Mark before we get started.”

“Thanks, good luck to you too.” Jaime said as Kevin made his way off toward another part of the tournament room. Maybe he could talk to Kevin about this. In the past year he’d become a good friend and had already heard a bit of the story anyway. He was saved from falling into thinking more about Tricia when he realized the player on his right was talking to him.”

“Excuse me?” Jaime said. “I missed that I’m sorry.”

“I just asked if you really knew Kevin James,” the player asked. “he’s really good.”

“He is that,” Jaime asked. “He’s helped me a lot in the past year or so. He got me my sponsorship deal too.”

“Oh shit!” a player across from Jaime said. “I hoped we’d get away with no pros on this table. I was hoping you’d just bought that shirt.”

“Sorry to disappoint but they gave me the shirt when I signed my life away,” Jaime said with a smile, feeling both a bit proud and a bit embarrassed at the player’s reactions.

They began making small talk about the tournament circuit until the Tournament Director began his pre-tournament announcements. Then came the call “Shuffle up and Deal” and Jaime quickly fell into thinking solely about the tournament and the players at his table as play began.

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